February 22, 2007

A Brief History of Ice Cream

Once upon a time, ice cream sucked. Yet, no one noticed because even sucky ice cream is still pretty good.

Then, Ben and Jerry changed the world. They put MEGA huge amounts of chunks in their ice cream. They also swirled their ice cream incredibly well. People suddenly could get a little of everything in every bite! Genius! The ice cream was more expensive, but it was worth it!

Then Ben and Jerry sold their ice cream company and little by little, ice cream began to suck again. For some reason, there were fewer chunks in Ben Jerry's ice cream, and the chunks didn't taste as fresh, either. The new owners even invented "Core" ice cream that was no longer swirled, but instead, required you to dip your utensil into each flavor of ice cream in order to get a taste of everything, much like the sucky old days. So, ice cream went back to sucking and still, no one noticed, because even when it sucks, ice cream is still pretty good.

Pssst...hey, kids! Re-read this blog replacing the words "ice cream" with the word "sex"!

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